One Year Later

What a year without expectations taught me

It’s been quiet here.

Between the holidays and planning Lexi’s birthday, it’s the first time my creativity bank is a little empty. Some seasons are like that—you have to pour into the people and moments right in front of you, and the rest has to wait.

But I wanted to show up today, because it’s been just over a year since I was laid off. And I’ve been carrying some thoughts, that I’ve spoken out loud to friends, but I needed to put somewhere.

On solitude

I’ve been working since I was sixteen. Part-time jobs, working full-time while being in college full-time, the grind of building a career I thought I wanted. There was always somewhere to be, someone to report to, some metric to hit, something to learn.

This year has been the most I’ve ever been alone with my own thoughts. And I don’t mean lonely—I mean quiet. No expectations. No performance reviews. Just me, our household, and my daughter.

People keep telling me I look lighter. Not weight—something else. Like whatever I was carrying finally put itself down.

On letting go

I’ve made peace with something I didn’t expect: maybe all the things I thought I wanted in a career weren’t actually mine. Maybe they were borrowed ambitions. Expectations I absorbed somewhere along the way and never questioned.

I’m thinking about part-time work now. Something fulfilling. Something that fits the life I’m building instead of the other way around.

(I know this is a privileged place to land. I don’t take it for granted.)

On serendipity

Something is blooming that I’m not ready to talk about yet.

But I’ll say this: it wouldn’t have happened if I was still on that path I thought I wanted to be on. Because you can’t grab lunch with a friend outside your own neighborhood and have someone serendipitously overhear something you’re working on.

To November 2024 me

Everything will be okay.

You’ll be happier. Healthier. Better hydrated, even.

The household will run smoothly. Lexi will be thriving. Your marriage will too.

You just have to get through the part where you don’t know any of this yet.

Did this find spark something for you too? ✨

If you’re drawn to the same thoughtful content that catches my eye, consider joining our growing community at Pixel et Prose Atelier. You’ll catch these free “Between the Lines” posts every other Wednesday, plus deeper Stardust Chronicles that explore life’s bigger adventures and reflections and in-depth book recaps and recommendations.

There’s magic in the everyday—let’s discover it together.